Imperfection
by Jyocka
Summary: [Oneshot no longer] Three humans. All imperfect. Then Susannah found someone who had always been there, not always perfect, but always in the background, and she realises that true love can be found in places other then fairytales.
1. NUMB

_**Imperfection**_

**PART I**

**This is something a little different. It's not a cliché, and hasn't been done before…at least I don't think so.**

**I don't own the copyrights of Mediator under my bed. I checked, I promise.**

**Enjoy.**

000

You know what the funny thing about bars is? There's always someone in them.

Always. Seriously.

So when I stumbled through a bar at 2:30 PM on a Monday, somewhere in an alley in New York, it was half full with men in beards carrying all the signs of unemployment.

I wonder if they're single too, like me.

I sat on a bar stool.

'Gimme the strongest of what you've got. No wait, cross that, give me a Bloody Mary. Strong'

The bartender didn't as much as blink. Guess you get used to how pathetic people's lifes' can get, huh?

I bet Paul's gonna be late. He said 2:30, it's 2:35. Oh well. Who cares.

I was sitting there, slurping my drink (I have no clue what it is; Jesse was the one who liked drinking, not me)

Always, I was sitting there, minding my own business, trying to decide the easiest way to commit suicide, when Paul came in the bar.

Paul Michael Slater.

And here I was think he wouldn't have come. I mean, it was a little crazy, even to me, this situation we were in.

He just sat down, two seats away from me, and without looking right or left mumbled something to the bartender.

I ignored him and the chugged the rest of my drink.

**_Y_esterday**

_I could barely pick up my three suitcases and Versace purse. I was so proud of myself; the tears didn't come till I reached the elevator. I could tell that Jesse still felt bad and guilty._

_Well, let him. He deserved it for all the agony and humiliation he put me through._

_He promised to help me anytime he could, and reminded me that he would be in touch. That's just who he is._

_Some people are like that._

_Some people can be so fucking kind to you, while they're backstabbing the whole time._

_I loved him._

_That's all I could think the whole elevator ride down. I loved his stupid smile and stupid respect for woman, and his perfect profession, and the way that I never even suspected till the last minute he was breaking up with me._

'_Querida…'_

_I shook my head to clear the voice._

_Being alive suited Jesse. He loved living life. When we dated, he actually enjoyed going to dance clubs and parties. I had thought he wouldn't; I mean; he used to be so righteous and just so…the good guy. The guy I could count on to drive me home safe. I was always the one who would go crazy and need excitement and get into trouble._

_He was supposed to save me from that._

_But what I didn't count on was 150 years. You know, that's a hell of a long time._

_So after a while, as all people do, Jesse inevitably changed. _

**Present Time**

Paul still hadn't looked at me, and I kind of liked it. Just observing him, not believing how much he'd changed in just...when was it, three years since I last saw him? Four.

The last time was when he'd asked me for one last dance at my wedding. My wedding to Jesse.

He had changed so much in looks since then it was scary. And something told me his looks weren't the only thing that had changed. He was a different man.

But then, I'd had my fair share of watching people change.

**Yesterday**

_The strangest thing in our break-up was the fact that the day before, we had been fine. Jesse had never let me even think for a moment that we would be over._

_We were married, for godsake._

_Hell, I still couldn't believe that all the time he had been planning on how to break the news. The terrible, terrible words that still haunt me and ring in my ears, on the sidewalk in New York._

_Just STOP, Suze. Don't think about that._

_I distracted myself by checking into a seedy cheap hotel and dumping my bag on the bed, all on auto-pilot. The only time my voice wavered when the man behind the desk in the lobby asked me my name._

'_Susannah De Sil- I mean Simon. Just Susannah Simon.'_

_He'd looked all knowingly at me and my stupid suitcases and Versace purse._

**Present Time**

'Suze. Didn't see you there.'

'I'm sure you didn't.'

'What are you drinking?'

'I'm-I'm not sure, exactly. It's called a Bloody Mary; one of my friends drinks it on a regular basis. No clue what's in it. It's nice, though. Why don't you tell me, I'm sure _you _know.' I said blabbered, then felt the numbness rush back into me.

'Look Suze…' He self consciously ran a hand through his hair and took a sip of his gin and tonic.

Then I felt sorry for him. I was being a bitch. He hadn't done anything to me, as far as I had known in the last four years. And, from what he'd told me, he was suffering a loss too.

All of a sudden it struck my just how surreal this was. I was in some bar with Paul, slowly getting drunker, and I was feeling sorry for him.

Ha. That's rich. I pitied him when basically we were in the same boat.

'Where are you staying?'

I looked at him then, really looked, deep into his eyes. He seemed truly concerned to know.

I just laughed. Several men looked up.

'Hey baby, we can make you laugh too, laugh all night long if you want.' One of them, who wore a red bandanna, called out to me, winking.

Paul tensed but didn't move.

I ignored them both and told the bartender to give me another drink.

_**The Day Before Yesterday. Ignore Pun.**_

_It's strange, but I didn't cry. I just know that I'll never forget his exact words and my exact clothes._

_I'm serious._

_We had just got back from Jill what's Her Name's party around four. I was in a white D&G mini and a black scoop neck. White silver and pearl earrings. No make-up. What was the point?_

'_Susannah we need to talk.' He pulled of his shoes and shirt, and got in bed in his boxers. I used to think that was sexy. At that time, at 4AM, all I could think was - dude you need some deo._

_What?_

_So sue me if the effects of him dancing all night long in the same room with 40 other bodies were getting on my nerves._

_AND my secretary quit today, too._

'_What for?' I mumbled. The only talking I wanted to do was…no wait I didn't wanna talk. Period._

'_Susannah, I love you. I think we have a great marriage. You know that, right?'_

'_Mhhmm' I mumbled and snuggled into my blankets. Don't worry, I changed the skirt first. All I wearing was a large oversized tee and underwear._

'_But…you know how I used to have trouble fitting in, back at the start? How hard it was for me, and how you helped me the whole way?' His voice was soft, strong, and not slurred. A miracle considering how many beers he'd downed._

_I stiffened. You see, Jesse never talks about his life as a ghost. He seemed resent all those years he wasted. He had hid it pretty well, when I first met him, but now that he was alive he was intent on never feeling that frustration and loneliness again._

_And I had completely understood. What I didn't get was why he was bringing this up now._

'_Look, I know you won't believe this. But-but it's come to a point where I can't control it any longer. Susannah, I'm sure you've noticed how much I've changed.' Stop beating around the bush already, dammit! I thought, my drowsiness fading quickly. _

'_Susannah, I guess what I'm trying to say…is that I'm tired of married life.'_

_I froze. Not just my body, but my every organ, my heart, my brains. Only my ears kept hearing the words I refused to believe._

'_I spent 150 years on my own, and time seemed to just stretch on endlessly. Then-then' His voice broke to almost a whisper 'I met you and it was the happiest time of my life. But then I become alive, and everything was happening so fast…I worked my way through medical school, and I had no to time to really live life. Now, finally, we're married and yet…' It hurt him to say this but he had to; he had no choice anymore._

'_I love living. I love partying, enjoying with friends, dancing…and I never really had the chance to date.' He said the last part so quietly I almost didn't hear it._

_But I did. And it tore my heart out._

'_Are you cheating on me?' My voice was dry, brittle._

'_Of course not! I would never do that to you!' His voice was agitated. 'Please try to understand I will always love you. But I don't feel ready to be in a serious relationship. I don't want the responsibility of a family. Please, mi querida, try to understand…150 years is just too much. I can't take it all in, even now.'_

_I lay there in the silence, in the dark. I remembered Carmel. I remembered the long sun soaked days that Jesse and I spent there, exploring the beaches, just reveling in being in each other's company._

_We didn't want anything, anyone else. Just the two of us were enough for each other. When had that changed? _

_I lay there, and asked God._

_Why did we want so much from life?_

**Present time**

Soon we both were pretty drunk. No, I'm talking wasted drunk. Seriously. He was calling me Susie and I was putting my hand on his thighs and leaning towards him.

'Paulie! Did I eva tell ya 'bout how – how hot you are?' This struck me as extremely hilarious. I started giggling, hysterically.

'Susie, love, it's such a great thing that you ditched the gay cowboy, now we can go and have hot wild sex in the back of the bar.' He said, slurring.

I thought about it, and pouted.

'He's not gay, Paulie baby, but he is a cowboy.' I sat back, pleased to get this important fact clear. Jesse would be so proud of me.

'Oh yes, my bad', Paul nodded amicably and we both sat in a contented silence, slurping our drinks.

I got up. 'Ima- Ima go now, okie, Paulie smooch?' I tottered towards the door, drink in hand, oblivious to the catcalls and whistles.

Somewhere deep down, I felt a strange deep humiliation. I, Suze Simon, had been reduced to such a low? How had this happened?

I let the anger flow through me, and I turned. Paul was still sitting and drinking, grinning lewdly at the _barman. _I think that's when I pretty much lost it. Even Paul preferred going gay on the BARMAN rather then ogle at me. I scowled and marched up to him.

'Slater.' I said loudly. No more Paulie-waulie for him. Oh no, he was in big shit when we got home.

Suddenly I couldn't remember why I was so mad, or why this great bitter sadness was filling my very soul.

And I needed to pee.

But mommy said never to go pee in a public place if you can help it.

I miss mommy.

'Paul!' I said louder. He sighed and threw a bill at the bartender. He got up, swaggered towards the exit, and stepped out.

I dumped the rest of my drink over a man in a red bandanna and followed him out.

**Two hours later…I think**

I have no clue how we got home. I know it entailed a lot of yelling, pointing, hugging, and generally freaking out the population of New York. We wobbled through the streets, and got lost, and spent ages trying to find...well, we didn't know.

In the end, Paul had the presence of mind to hail a taxi, mumble out the address of his apartment.

**The Next Day**

I woke up in some strange bed, with a strange smell and strange bedclothes.

I turned and saw a bare back next to me, half covered with the blanket. I watched the steady rise and fall of his back for a moment, and then reluctantly tried to wake him.

'Jesse. Honey, we're gonna be late…' I moaned. 'Oh god, my head _hurts.' _My brain felt foggy…

I rolled him over and nearly fainted.

Paul. Holy crap!

It was like alarms going off in my head, and memories of yesterday came sharply back into focus.

Oh, this was not looking good. I mean, my life had gone from normal to freaky-off-the-scale-crazy in just three days. And, sure, my husband and love of my life wanted a divorce. So what?

I would have to learn to just deal. And that would NOT happen by getting drunk in a bar with Paul Slater.

Who, incidentally, was getting a divorce too. Except his was, like, on the verge of coming for months now. Or so he told me.

Its all his fault. Ohhh, there was going to be hell to pay…Paul always was an ass. Now, he has just dropped to an all time low by getting a girl drunk after losing the love of her life. I mean, I was in no state to protest when he met me in a café, and offered to meet me in a bar to 'catch up'.

Yeah, right. More like _get wasted _together.

All of a sudden I felt impossibly tired, even though I had just woken up. My headache was back in full force, and I felt like crying. Just letting it all out, all this anguish locked up in me, a dam to stop my emotions.

Because nothing, _nothing,_ was alright in the world if I didn't have Jesse with me. Together we were perfect, the model couple, the one who all our friends had envied when we were younger.

But now was not the time. I would not

'Hey, looks like someone woke up in a good mood. You know, I really liked being called honey. You should do it more often.' Paul drawled from his side of the bed.

I threw my pillow at his head and got out of bed.

'Did you _have _to sleep in the same bed as me, wearing…that?' I asked in distaste. I was still wearing yesterday's clothes. My hair was a mess. There was a bad taste in my mouth.

And I needed coffee. Badly.

'Well…I have only one bed. And I've been sleep half naked-', I winced. '-ever since I was nine.'

He finally got out of bed, stretching and (on purpose, I'm sure) giving me an eyeful of his very impressive abs.

He grown up to be a powerful man, even though his body wasn't beefy. He was tall, I noticed, taller then me, but that was no surprise.

I couldn't keep the blush of my damn face as I just stood there gawping at him like he was a Greek god. I felt like a schoolgirl all over again.

He wasn't beefy like a wrestler, but still had a very impressive six-pack and muscles in his chest and neck were corded tight.

Don't get me wrong. Jesse was very very yummy to look at in the buff, but he was somehow different. His body was more like a piece of art, sculpted and lean.

Paul was more solid, somehow more _there, _and I felt safe and at ease around. Which, considering our history, was saying something.

Whoa, since when do I stand around drooling at abs? I scowled at nothing in particular, snapped at Paul, 'For god's sake, put on a shirt and make me some coffee.' Ohhkay, Queen Suze, much?

He looked amused and pulled on a white undershirt from his closet.

Our breakfast conversation went something life this:

Paul went, 'I think it's time we sorted out a few things.'

Yeah. Hmm, like what, I suppose? Maybe...the messy net of thorns that are otherwise known as my life?

'Look, what do you need to sort out? Huh? Tell me. Ok, you're divorced. But you have your own place to live. You have a fat check every month due to the big shot lawyer I always knew you would be,' Actually I didn't know what his job was, but considering the size of his apartment I could pretty much assume he was getting a lot of dough. But by then I didn't care, I was cracking. 'You should ask the real question. _My _life needs to be sorted out, and that none of you're business. You've done enough, thank you very much.' I stood there in his kitchen breathing like I had just run a mile and staring at Paul.

Finally, he said something, breaking the tense silence between us.

'I'm not a lawyer.' Of all the things to say, I must say that was pretty random.

I just stared at him like saying, 'Soo…?'

'I'm a doctor. A neurologist to be exact.' He looked down at his hands. 'Just thought you should know before you assume too much,' His voice dropped to a whisper.

I sank back into the chair. Paul? A doctor? This was like the world had just turned even more messed then it already was. I felt like someone was writing my story for a dramatic show, but he got the characters all mixed up, like he was making them OOC.

But this was the truth, my life, my reality.

'But-but why?' I spluttered.

'Do you remember the night of the Winter Formal?' He asked, blue eyes boring into me.

Hah. As if I'd forget.

'I told you you'd made an impact on my life.' He shrugged, looking innocent, and drank some coffee. 'I guess I never realized how much.'

But I knew there was more to this then he was saying.

Then it hit me. 'Wait a minute, you just became one because you were trying to compete with Jesse, right?' I narrowed my eyes. Far-fetched? I didn't think so. 'So you could – even though it doesn't make sense – somehow _impress me?_

He looked embarrassed, and said sheepishly, 'I wouldn't put the way you did, but…yeah, that kinda-'

I didn't let him finish.

'HOW COULD YOU JUST-just change you're life for me? I asked, stunned.

Now he looked positively queasy.

'Maybe for hope that one day you'd change yours for me.' He said it so quietly I almost didn't hear him.

Almost.

And that is when I knew that there was no justice in this world.

Even a fairytale could change, even the prince could turn beast.

And, I was starting to realize, as I looked at Paul, even the beast, for the sake of love…could turn prince.

000

**A/N: This is a bit rushed, and I planned on making it a one-shot but that's changed now. There will be three parts. The next chapter will be better edited, I promise.**

**Please review because I'm not sure if this is ridiculous or something…Please, just drop a line : Ok, Bad, or Worse ?**

**Oh and thanks to my awesome beta, yabanabi! No guess who's writing this sentence hehe…**

**V**

**V**

**V **


	2. THAW

_**Disclaimer : Just messing with these people. Do not own.**_

_**AN: Thanks to all my reviewers. Thee is nothing better then thinking, ok, well that's the last of the reviews, and then one stray review comes a while later. A real motivator!**_

_**The tone is changed in this chapter. Her pain is thawing. So the style is slightly lighter and not as depressing as the last chapter. And this one is better edited.**_

**_For the Sour.Skittles.

* * *

_**

_**Last Time**_

'_HOW COULD YOU JUST-just change you're life for me? I asked, stunned._

_Now he looked positively queasy._

'_Maybe for hope that one day you'd change yours for me.' He said it so quietly I almost didn't hear him._

_Almost._

_And that is when I knew that there was no justice in this world._

_Even a fairytale could change, even the prince could turn beast._

_And, I was starting to realize, as I looked at Paul, even the beast, for the sake of love…could turn prince.

* * *

_

**Present Time Two Days After Mid-Life Crisis**

Ok, so I totally freaked when I finally found it. I mean, we had been apartment-hunting for ages and ages and I was beginning to think that I would never, NEVER find an apartment that wasn't a studio but with one bedroom, a coffee shop nearby, my office nearby, Paul's place nearby (don't look at me, he insisted), AND fitting my budget.

But I did. Or, I should say, _Paul _did.

It was a cozy, typical Manhattan style apartment building. And I could get the lease on it straight away.

I inspected the inner rooms while Paul talked to the landlord, Jim. It wasn't huge, but it would do.

The kitchen was so small maybe four people would fit, and that would be squeeze. There was a living room, which admittedly was quite spacious. And there was just one bedroom where I'd try and squash my double bed- I mean, some new furniture.

Because my previous bed had been a king size. That I had shared with Jesse…

Along with a flat screen TV, 6-DVD Player, A Top-notch kitchen, _and_ a special room that we called the study where Jesse and I _used_ to crash in after our long exhausting days.

Past tense. Ouch. That hurt.

'_STOP it Suze! Thinking like this is just gonna hurt you more instead of helping you heal',_ said a voice deep in my consciousness. I kid you not.

ARRGH! What kind of inner voice is this? A shrink?! Now even my own brain is against me! I'm losing all my sanity!!

…Not that I had much left to start with, anyways.

But I refuse to even let my mind boss me around. I'm a mature professional adult now, thank you very much. I have dealt with a break-up between me and the love of life quite well, If I do say so myself.

Shut up. The bit where I got wasted doesn't count.

So I am perfectly capable of dealing with the problem of the voice in my head maturely and with dignity.

_If I want to think about Jesse, there's nothing you can do to stop me!!! HE left ME, remember? So, duh, I'm still in love incase you've forgotten! I defy you! So…hah!_ I yelled at the annoying little voice. In my head, no less.

Right, Suze, great job. Why don't you just go ahead and have an argument with yourself, huh?

I so need help.

I finished my inspection of my-soon-to-be apartment and walked back to Paul. He looked at me all satisfied.

'I got you a great rent,' He whispered conspiratorially, behind the landlord's back. (What's that you say? You want a description of my pot-bellied landlord who has absolutely no fashion sense at All? I mean, come on, a pale green shirt with a tie which looked puked on? Trust me, you don't. Want a description, I mean.)

'How much?' I whispered back.

He told me. I nearly fell when he told me. I would have fallen straight onto the maroon carpet in the hallway and totally gotten carpet burns if Paul hadn't caught me.

Paul really came through for me, I swear. I mean with the rent thing and the fact he saved me from carpet burns.

And no, I didn't really feel anything when his his muscular tanned arm shot out and steadied me by the shoulders, with no effort at all. Or when he looked at me all smirky and said 'Jeez, Simon, watch where you're going.'

Nope. Nothing. Really!

I was about to retaliate when the door of the apartment next to mine opened, and a man with a small dalmation walked out.

And well that kinda diverted me because…

He was HOT. I mean it. He was kind of tall, taller then Paul, but not TOO tall. Kind of like a big bear. A big cuddly bear. Sigh…and that's not all - he had shaggy black hair, which kept covering his eyes, an added plus point. Really, really cute.

He had this kind of just-got-out-of-bed-don't-bug-me kind of look. And yes, I'm proud to say I noticed all of this when the three of us were waiting for the elevator. See? My boss is wrong. I _am_ observant. Just not when a senior management boss walks right in and I mistake him for the new electrician.

What? They both wear blue suits! Ugh. Give me a hottie anyday.

When the elevator finally reached the 11th floor, it was a little awkward with all of us trying to cram in. Especially with "Shaggy's" dalmation. We all kind of stood in the four different corners. Me and Shaggy were beside the elevator doors, and Paul and Pot Belly leaned against the gilted mirror. The elevator was kinda shabby with this faded maroon wallpaper and soft music which wouldn't have been out of place in a haunted mansion.

I can see that changes will be made…by me, of course. Yup, I have plans for this place.

Unhh…is it just me or it Shaggy watching me in the mirror underneath his impossibly long lashes? It's that or he's scrutinizing Pot Belly.

Well, I don't think he's doing that. At least, I hope not.

Suddenly, while I was musing about Shaggy, his dalmation leaped up in front of me, and I admit it, I kinda shrieked in fright. Hey, you would too.

But it turned out the dog was harmless; the big cutie smooochy-poochie (the dog, NOT the owner. Just clearing that up) just licked my whole hand.

'Whoa boy, easy there,' I said, laughing a little. I shook my hands trying unsuccessfully to get the slobber off me.

The Shaggy guy managed to grab hold of the dog's collar. 'Sorry about that,' He said, his voice all low, not really meeting my eyes.

I flashed him my best smile. 'It's no problem at all.' He gave me a shy smile. The landlord, Mr Bradley, made a sound like he was gagging on something in his throat.

Unbelievable, the rudeness of some people…

Paul must have noticed too, because he was standing firmly planted on two feet, his hands crossed, stonily watching the numbers flick by on the electronic screen thingy.

As if he couldn't wait to get out of there.

'We'll give you a call.' He muttered to Pot Belly, pushed in front of Shaggy and the Scooby and practically hauled me by the elbow out of there before I could so much as ask Shaggy what his name was.

I swear, I do so not get him sometimes.

* * *

**Later that same day**

Back at his flat we each opened a can of beer and sprawled out on his couches. I was beat…but at least I found a home. On a Sunday, no less.

Somehow, though, I didn't feel as victorious as I had before.

It all seemed rather pointless. I was as dry emotionally as a sponge in the sun, I was staying in a seedy hotel, and, from now on, I am officially friendless. Because all of Jesse's friends were….well, _Jesse's_ friends, not really mine. And besides, hanging out with them would be just plain weird.

Well, I'm nice right? Except for the occasional tantrum and bitchy attack, I'm a nice person. I think. Hmm, if I'm so nice, why did Jesse leave me?

No. No, he didn't, he just speeded up the inevitable. Yeah, that's right, we're just not meant to be. And I'll make my own new friends. How hard can it be?

I'll show Jesse, I thought viciously as I downed the rest of the beer in one gulp. I don't need him.

Who needs a hot Latino guy who can practically read you're mind? Who _gets me?_ Who understands the way I work? Respects the way I prefer to kick ghost butt on my own? I don't. Nope, not me. I'm over him already.

'So, Suze, want to get out here for a while?' Paul said from his bean bag, eyeing my beer can apprehensively. I bet he heard the sloshing around in the practically empty can.

'Why?' I snapped.

'Well…it's a beautiful day. We can…go…out..' He finished lamely, and then jumped up.

'Hey, I have the greatest idea ever!' He said in a bad attempt to look excited. Doesn't work on me, Paul, I thought grimly. I knew what he was trying to do.

'I know what you're trying to do, you know, and it won't work.' I said boredly.

He raised an eyebrow. 'Oh really? What if I said all I'm trying to do is convince you to come with me to my club for a game of tennis, huh? I'll teach you and I have a spare racket.' He said, smirking and looking pleased with himself for getting out of the awkward situation.

Something told me he wasn't exactly used dealing with girls who'd just been divorced, drunk, very hung over and hung up on her ex.

But as soon as he mentioned tennis, my cheeks began to heat up.

Unhh, this is not good. This was - was worse then Jesse! He hadn't just read my mind, he'd just exposed my greatest fear!

I probably sound crazy right about now.

I knew I was definitely crazy when 30 minutes later I found myself in Paul's car, in shorts and a polo shirt (we stopped by the hotel. Thank god I'd be outta there, the hotel I mean.) on the way to Paul's - no doubt - posh country club.

We reached the parking lot and I nervously thought…_he'll find out any minute now…_

He signed my name in the guest form at the reception. _Susannah Simon. _

I had a sudden vision of me in college, late at night in my dorm, writing over and over again over my notebook, Susannah De Silva, over and over again…

I mentally shook myself and followed him outside. His club was posh and refined; the kind where rich country club wives met over Sunday brunch and gossiped about the latest scandal. There were six tennis courts, and four of them were taken. Paul led me to one pretty much isolated from the rest.

I guess he thought I'd need the space for all the balls I served off course.

'Ok, well, I'll just give you some easy shots, just hit them back using you're right hand, like this, is called forehand -'

'Paul, I pretty much know how to play.' I said tersely.

'Oh – alright then, let's play.' He said looking taken aback.

We served and I rallied back. Back and forth, back and forth. I began to relax a little, losing my self with the rhythm. Finally after about forty-five minutes we stopped for water.

'Suze, where did you learn to play?' Asked Paul, truly surprised. 'And so good, I mean your backhand is damn awesome!' He said in awe.

'I – unhh – I just – felt like taking lessons.' I mumbled quietly, taking a long gulp and hiding my face from him.

It didn't work. He was just too damn fast; he jumped to conclusions so fast, but unfortunately this time they were the right conclusions.

He narrowed his eyes and swiveled me around by the shoulders. I choked on my water. 'When did you begin, Suze? When did you start playing?' He said, his eyes boring into mine. I spluttered, 'None of your business, Paul!'

'Oh c'mon, there must be some reason why, all of a sudden you began to learn, huh?' He said, a grin beginning to form on his face.

'Oh shut up,' I snapped, blushing furiously now.

'Hmm…are you sure it's not because...'He pretended to think. 'You wanted to be like a certain someone? You wanted to feel…somehow linked with this certain someone?' He mused out loud, knowing how much it was driving me nuts.

'Ok, FINE, so I took lessons to see what you liked so much about it, ok?' I burst out. STUPID STUPID STUPID. 'I just wanted to see what the great mighty Paul Slater, badass all around, actually enjoyed doing, is that such a bad thing?' I was so red by know that I could feel the heat bouncing off my skin.

This was so embarrassing. I hadn't meant to tell anyone about my real reason to learn tennis. Jesse hadn't minded when I said I wanted to learn, just shrugged and helped me find a good coach.

'Oh no, it's not a bad thing at all.' Said Paul. He leaned closer to me, and I could see sweat droplets clinging t his skin, and his hair plastered all over his forehead. Somehow he still managed to look hot. He leaned up close to me, right there next to the water cooler, and whispered next to my ear, 'In fact, I'm touched you still thought of me during all this time. I would have never believed –' He paused there, hesitating, confusion over his face and, after a moment of hesistaion and - longing? - pulled back.

My heart was pounding. OH please, don't pull away, one part of my brain said. The other part wanted to run, far _far_ away.

After that no one of mentioned where I'd learned tennis. He looked kind of shy and he kept stealing small glances at me, like trying to figure something out.

As for me, I pretty much remained silent and wondered the whole time…why was Paul so different? He was much less, well, horny, he wasn't as rude, he just…_cared _more, y'know? Maybe it was because he respected the fact that I was trying so very hard not to fall apart, trying to put up this farce that nothing is wrong, but really, I'm dying inside. Maybe he understands. Understands how I miss Jesse so incredible much, how much I feel like a puppy kicked out of a home…

Wow. Intense analysis of Suze Simon's pathetic love life. Meh.

What felt like hours later, we headed back to his car, arguing just like the way we used to. About music, no less.

'Really Suze. Jesse's made you soft.' He smirked, ignoring my flinch at hearing Jesse's name. 'Never thought you'd be the one to listen to Red Hot Chilli Peppers.'

'It's Jesse's favourite band!' I defended him. Hey, they're good, just not hardcore, so what?

'What do you listen to, emo music?' I challenged. Then I realized the ridiculous-ness of what I'd said and we both burst out laughing.

We reached his Mustang and he opened the door for me.

'M'lady', He said.

Wow. Déjà vu.

I smiled softly at him. 'Thanks'. I lightly punched him on the arm. 'For…everything. For…well, you know what I mean.' He just stood there with his hands in his pockets and his ears turned kind of crimson.

'No problem, babe.' He gave me a half-hearted smile, and suddenly I got the feeling that he was so much older then me. Strange.

He slid into the driver's seat and said, 'Well you see, someone's gotta be nice to you, seeing as Jesse has corrupted you. I mean, jeez, you were humming Pink in the shower this morning, you know.' He said, smugly grinning. I stuck my tongue out at him.

Scratch that. He isn't mature at ALL. And err, neither am I.

'And how would you know what I was singing in the shower if I was humming?' I asked nastily. He turned red and stuttered something but I didn't let him finish.

'Don't worry Paul, why don't you just go home and listen to the Paris Hilton CD I found under your bed, huh? I said smugly.

He looked at me in horror. 'Oh crap! Suze! Its-it's not what you th-! Damn, that's low even for you!' He said grumpily. He turned red enough to make a lobster jealous.

Gotcha!

Ha. I so rock. I think.

_Simon : 1_

_Slater : 2_

* * *

**_A/N: Well now, I didn't take too long to update, did I? I'm not sure what the length of this story is going to be, but it's way too long (the plot, I mean) to be a one shot. So this will probably be some kind of short story thingy, with multiple chapters._**

**_Thanks for reading, feedback are appreciated more then compliments, and I hope you had a great Halloween!_**

**_Xoxox.Jyocka.xoxoX_**


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